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  • Title: Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship
  • Author: Kayleen Schaefer
  • ISBN: -
  • Page: 171
  • Format: Paperback

  • Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship By Kayleen Schaefer Text Me has the thrills and laughs of a romantic comedy, but with an inverted message There just isn t only one love story in our lives, Schaefer writes If you re lucky, friends will be the protagonists in these multiple love stories It s high time that we start seeing it that way NPR A personal and sociological examination and ultimately a celebration of t Text Me has the thrills and laughs of a romantic comedy, but with an inverted message There just isn t only one love story in our lives, Schaefer writes If you re lucky, friends will be the protagonists in these multiple love stories It s high time that we start seeing it that way NPR A personal and sociological examination and ultimately a celebration of the evolution of female friendship in pop culture and modern societyFor too long, women have been told that we are terrible at being friends, that we can t help being cruel or competitive, or that we inevitably abandon each other for romantic partners But we are rejecting those stereotypes and reclaiming the power of female friendship.In Text Me When You Get Home, journalist Kayleen Schaefer interviews than one hundred women about their BFFs, soulmates, girl gangs, and queens while tracing this cultural shift through the lens of pop culture Our love for each other is reflected in Abbi and Ilana, Issa and Molly, squadgoals, the acclaim of Girls Trip and Big Little Lies, and Galentine s Day.Schaefer also includes her own history of grappling with a world that told her to rely on men before she realized that her true source of support came from a strong tribe of women Her personal narrative and celebration of her own relationships weaves throughout the evolution of female friendship on screen, a serious look at how women have come to value one another and our relationships Text Me When You Get Home is a validation that has never existed before A thoughtful, heart soaring, deeply reported look at how women are taking a stand for their friendships and not letting go Get A Copy Kindle Store StoresAudibleBarnes NobleWalmart eBooksApple BooksGoogle PlayAbebooksBook DepositoryIndigoAlibrisBetter World BooksIndieBoundLibraries Or buy for Paperback, 304 pages Expected publication February 5th 2019 by Dutton Books first published February 6th 2018 More Details Original Title Text Me When You Get Home The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship ISBN 110198614X ISBN13 9781101986141 Other Editions 6 All Editions Add a New Edition Combine Less Detail edit details Win a Copy of This Book Text Me When You Get Home The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship by Kayleen Schaefer Author Release date Feb 05, 2019 For too long, women have been told that we are terrible at being friends, that we can t help being cruel or competitive, or that we inevitably abandon For too long, women have been told that we are terrible at being friends, that we can t help being cruel or competitive, or that we inevitably abandon each other for romantic partners But we are rejecting those stereotypes and reclaiming the power of female friendship.In Text Me When You Get Home, journalist Kayleen Schaefer interviews than one hundred women about their BFFs, soulmates, girl gangs, and queens while tracing this cultural shift through the lens of pop culture Our love for each other is reflected in Abbi and Ilana, Issa and Molly, squadgoals, the acclaim of Girls Trip and Big Little Lies, and Galentine s Day.Schaefer also includes her own history of grappling with a world that told her to rely on men before she realized that her true source of support came from a strong tribe of women Her personal narrative and celebration of her own relationships weaves throughout the evolution of female friendship on screen, a serious look at how women have come to value one another and our relationships.Text Me When You Get Home is a validation that has never existed before A thoughtful, heart soaring, deeply reported look at how women are taking a stand for their friendships and not letting go Enter Giveaway Format Print book

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    Lists with This Book Feminist interest 2019 152 books 30 voters More lists with this book Community Reviews Showing 1 30 Rating details Sort Default Filter Dec 22, 2017 Betsy Kipnis rated it did not like it review of another edition Ugh This book was a complete waste of time The author is self indulgent and weaves her fantastic state of friendship affairs in and out of historic discusssion of the evolution of feminine friendship as represented on television I read to avoid television and reading this book is like watching all the television shows I ve avoided sans Sex In The City The author replays way too much of mentioned show episodes, and as a premise this hardly reads as a sociological analysis but as a bunc Ugh This book was a complete waste of time The author is self indulgent and weaves her fantastic state of friendship affairs in and out of historic discusssion of the evolution of feminine friendship as represented on television I read to avoid television and reading this book is like watching all the television shows I ve avoided sans Sex In The City The author replays way too much of mentioned show episodes, and as a premise this hardly reads as a sociological analysis but as a bunch of chicks bonding over favorite as they daintily throwback a glass of Prosecco Rose too swanky for this lot It s a shame because I think this analysis is meaningful to make and value can be gained for those whom may struggle with female friendships, groups of women, or just don t fit into the shiny new Stepford gal personae Perhaps the author can submit this book to TV guide and gain the response they re seeking for this effort Thanks anyway Netgalley flag 40 likesLike see review View 1 comment Mar 05, 2018 Marta rated it did not like it review of another edition Shelves dystopia, gender, to the ladies, wtf fml, white cis heteronormativity This book is just a buzzfeed article about 20 reasons Your Galentine s Day Gal is More than Your BFF She s Your LITERAL SOUL MATE no homo But instead of Galentine s Day GIFs the author writes things like Galentine s Day was introduced to the world by Leslie Knope, a fictional midlevel bureaucrat in an Indiana parks and recreation department on the NBC sitcom Parks and Recreation The real question this book shaped listicle poses is who, or WHAT, wrote it Was it written by a real human This book is just a buzzfeed article about 20 reasons Your Galentine s Day Gal is More than Your BFF She s Your LITERAL SOUL MATE no homo But instead of Galentine s Day GIFs the author writes things like Galentine s Day was introduced to the world by Leslie Knope, a fictional midlevel bureaucrat in an Indiana parks and recreation department on the NBC sitcom Parks and Recreation The real question this book shaped listicle poses is who, or WHAT, wrote it Was it written by a real human person who has simply decided to rebrand herself as a 100% white female feminist who treasures values worships white women s ways of brunching no homo Or was it written by an AI who took a bunch of instragram feeds, buzzfeed articles, and entries about TV shows starring white ladies and turned it into this book It could go either way, but I think the AI would have included some information about people of color existing and making art and entertainment, have considered things that happened before 1980, would have at least met some gay people, would have some critical thinking skillz, might consider that the gender binary is a social construct, and would not have no homo ed the following things Beacheslesbian love poetryThelma LouiseBoston Marriages2 Female Olympic Athletes dancing around their room topless except for their olympic medals covering their breasts, like one medal over each breast, and this is the form their joy is takingSarah PaulsonWomen Gently Embracing While Looking In Each Other s Eyes and Planning to Live Together and Raise their Babies As Part of One FamilyAll Romantic and Sexual Relationships Between Women Throughout History Anyway, this book is the worst, but it was pretty fun to Mean Girl it flag 39 likesLike see review View all 4 comments Mar 01, 2018 Danielle H rated it it was amazing review of another edition Shelves 2018, borrowed a copy, non fiction I feel it s appropriate to say that I texted one of my friends while reading, I am legit holding back tears reading this book at work because a girl s best friend died and I can t process the idea of you being dead She is a person I text when I get home There are so many of her and I am so incredibly lucky to have all of these women in my life who support me and love me and get me and let me tell them in so many ways, Let s keep talking Would really recommend to anyone who has ever l I feel it s appropriate to say that I texted one of my friends while reading, I am legit holding back tears reading this book at work because a girl s best friend died and I can t process the idea of you being dead She is a person I text when I get home There are so many of her and I am so incredibly lucky to have all of these women in my life who support me and love me and get me and let me tell them in so many ways, Let s keep talking Would really recommend to anyone who has ever loved a lady friend flag 20 likesLike see review Mar 26, 2018 Dina rated it it was ok review of another edition I couldn t figure out what about this book rubbed me the wrong way until after I finished it.The incredibly patronizing author really doesn t have a clue.There were parts that resonated and made sense, but the author kept going on and on about how she shunned female friendships her whole life, how she looked down on women who had squads, and how she was of a man s girl and related to men than to women Then one day, she meets a girl in her office that GASP likes beer and yoga I couldn t figure out what about this book rubbed me the wrong way until after I finished it.The incredibly patronizing author really doesn t have a clue.There were parts that resonated and made sense, but the author kept going on and on about how she shunned female friendships her whole life, how she looked down on women who had squads, and how she was of a man s girl and related to men than to women Then one day, she meets a girl in her office that GASP likes beer and yoga like she does What Women like geeky things And not all women like pink and sparkles and glitter I AM SHOCKED AND APPALLED I might have been reading this too closely, but I think she came off as incredibly condescending and entitled She spent the whole first third of the book talking about how she never had time for female friendships with all the ballet classes, pledging for sororities, dating guys, gossiping, drinking, dating guys, picking up guys, scouting for guysAnd then wondering why other women in her life didn t invite her to sleepovers It wasn t even a research y book All she seemed to do is interview a handful of people about how they met their best friends, and then watched whatever was on TV that day and commented on the female relationships that were being portrayed I will be publishing my socio economical analysis of the ABC show Once Upon a Time any day now flag 17 likesLike see review View all 5 comments Leah Yeah she was really misogynistic and talked about her obsession with guys for WAY TOO LONG then was like, oh, guess what, girls aren t that gross.And Yeah she was really misogynistic and talked about her obsession with guys for WAY TOO LONG then was like, oh, guess what, girls aren t that gross.And she acts like she made this great discovery Jun 05, 2018 10 43AM Emma Deplores Censorship She was too busy pledging for sororities to have time for female friendships What Isn t the point of sororities to make a group of close female frie She was too busy pledging for sororities to have time for female friendships What Isn t the point of sororities to make a group of close female friends Or did she view them as just a convenient way to get invited to frat parties Feb 01, 2019 10 52AM Jun 13, 2018 Meredith B readingwithmere marked it as did not finish review of another edition DNFFirst, I hate not finishing books I have the personality that I like to see something all the way through to the end but I just couldn t spend my time on this one This was our June book club pick and I really wanted to like it but I just didn t.This book is all about the female friendship and how it s evolved over time Honestly, I think the biggest issue I had with this book is that it s simply not relate able to me in the least Do I have close female friends Yes Do I cherish their frie DNFFirst, I hate not finishing books I have the personality that I like to see something all the way through to the end but I just couldn t spend my time on this one This was our June book club pick and I really wanted to like it but I just didn t.This book is all about the female friendship and how it s evolved over time Honestly, I think the biggest issue I had with this book is that it s simply not relate able to me in the least Do I have close female friends Yes Do I cherish their friendships Yes But I DON T think they re important than my marriage or my family relationships I think ALL my relationships in my life are important and I balance them accordingly.The book grabs excerpts from women who talk about their female friendships Some say when they were younger and married that they just simply didn t have time and had to focus on their marriage Do I think that s probably evolved Yes, however if someone is a priority you will make time for them Case and point.I felt like I kept going in circles while reading this book and it was kind of the same story told differently over and over again.Again, I love the girls who are close in my life and will always cherish their friendship They re important but so are my other relationships I just couldn t agree with the book in this way flag 16 likesLike see review View all 7 comments Apr 01, 2018 Jen rated it did not like it review of another edition I wanted to like this book but I just didn t It was too chatty, anecdotal, heavy on pop culture references and felt very specific to young, white privileged middle or upper middle class women s experiences I don t know, I m not sure what I wanted from this book but I didn t get it Like, obviously female friendship is extremely powerful and rewarding and my best friend is basically like my life partner but this book didn t really illuminate anything for me and I just didn t care for the st I wanted to like this book but I just didn t It was too chatty, anecdotal, heavy on pop culture references and felt very specific to young, white privileged middle or upper middle class women s experiences I don t know, I m not sure what I wanted from this book but I didn t get it Like, obviously female friendship is extremely powerful and rewarding and my best friend is basically like my life partner but this book didn t really illuminate anything for me and I just didn t care for the style or treatment of the topic This should have been a 500 hundred word blog post that I still would have skimmed the regretted clicking the link on twitter I just don t know who the audience is for this book Dudes Women who brag that they don t have any female friends Aliens from another planet My two female cats that hate each other Read if you want confirmation of what you already know and have spare time on your hands I guess Or, better yet, spend the time you would have used to read this and call up your best friend to catch up because that is a better use of your time flag 15 likesLike see review View 1 comment Feb 18, 2018 Stacey Kimmel rated it it was ok review of another edition I wanted to like this book, but I was hoping for something well researched and thoughtful Instead I found it repetitive and sophomoric I returned after the second chapter, which focused on, of all things, the movie Beaches I would not have thought this movie worthy of than a paragraph, but she spends a CHAPTER on it, recounting the plot, how it differs from the book, and actor actress reminiscences of its making She claims that there are no movies about female friendship, and no literat I wanted to like this book, but I was hoping for something well researched and thoughtful Instead I found it repetitive and sophomoric I returned after the second chapter, which focused on, of all things, the movie Beaches I would not have thought this movie worthy of than a paragraph, but she spends a CHAPTER on it, recounting the plot, how it differs from the book, and actor actress reminiscences of its making She claims that there are no movies about female friendship, and no literature on female friendship not true , and never substantiates supports the claim except through personal anecdote One entire chapter covers letters of Julia Child to a woman who she feels must be Child s friend, she admits that every letter focuses on the development of Childs book Mastering the art of french cooking From what she shared, it seems clear to me that the letter exchanges are professional, not personal and there is no evidence of a friendship It DOES NOT SUPPORT THE THESIS but she spends a chapter guessing that although there is nothing in the letters to suggest they are friends, she thinks they must be Anecdote after anecdote, an odd reference to GREAT books like All the Single Ladies by Barbara Traister, but in the end, it reads like a senior thesis that a prof would have given a C for inadequate research.If you aren t looking for serious treatment of this topic and just want a chatty, anecdotal book, you might enjoy this book I was disappointed flag 13 likesLike see review View 1 comment Jun 04, 2018 Katie rated it liked it review of another edition Shelves girl power I enjoyed Text Me When You Get Home, but I also wanted it to go deeper At times, it felt like a memoir than a nonfiction piece exploring female friendship Often some of the most compelling arguments Kathleen Schaefer presented were quotes from other people s works For instance, I immediately went out and bought All the Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister after reading the excerpt Schaefer chose to include I think positive female friendship is an incredible worthy subject to dissect and di I enjoyed Text Me When You Get Home, but I also wanted it to go deeper At times, it felt like a memoir than a nonfiction piece exploring female friendship Often some of the most compelling arguments Kathleen Schaefer presented were quotes from other people s works For instance, I immediately went out and bought All the Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister after reading the excerpt Schaefer chose to include I think positive female friendship is an incredible worthy subject to dissect and discuss, so I was disappointed that Text Me When You Get Home only scratched the surface I felt like Schaefer would quickly list positive female relationships in pop culture without going on to further analyze them or the effect they had on our greater society In conclusion, I just wanted MORE On the positive side, Text Me When You Get Home is a super light, easy, fast read I powered through it in a day Also, it made me think about all my amazing best friends the entire time I read it, which is a lovely experience.Text Me When You Get Home is a good introduction to female friendship and feminism, but it certainly didn t challenging me or teach me anything I didn t already know However, I am really looking forward to discussing it for my feminist book club flag 15 likesLike see review Jan 23, 2019 Erica rated it it was ok review of another edition Shelves biographical, cataloged_it, bffs, feminism as a grownup, girlfriend power, non fiction, terribly disappointing, women and girls Hello, and welcome to my latest longass bitchy tirade Pour yourself some tea and we ll get started.I m not going to say anything that hasn t been said in all the other one and two star reviews but I really want to complain about this book so I m simply going to repeat everything else those other reviewers have already said only with pictures.Let s begin with the blurb for this title It says Text Me When You Get Home is a personal and sociological perspective and ultimately a celebrat Hello, and welcome to my latest longass bitchy tirade Pour yourself some tea and we ll get started.I m not going to say anything that hasn t been said in all the other one and two star reviews but I really want to complain about this book so I m simply going to repeat everything else those other reviewers have already said only with pictures.Let s begin with the blurb for this title It says Text Me When You Get Home is a personal and sociological perspective and ultimately a celebration of the evolution of the modern female friendship.It is not actually a sociological perspective of modern female friendship but is definitely a personal celebration of one woman s understanding of female friendship, specifically through the lens of pop culture.What I read was the story of a woman who, as a child, had girl friends but never best friends and by the time high school came about, only had the group of friends that harbored her from the slings and arrows of high school cruelty simply due to safety in numbers She went on to assume it was impossible to be friends with girls so she made friends with guys and had no girlfriends or best friends until she wised up and found her friend set and they re all in love and everything is lovely Also, media shows us that there are no healthy female friendships but we shouldn t listen to them because she is living proof that squads exist and you need one.And that s fine However, I was led to believe this was going to be something else entirely My biggest complaint about this book is that Schaefer forgoes an in depth exploration of a complex system and, instead, gently polishes the surface to a shine She waxes poetic about the meaning and purpose of female friendship and often sees the landscape in black and white, introducing set in stone societal beliefs of friendship and then affirming or rebutting those beliefs For instance, she cautions against assuming that, nowadays, girls are mean, which is a prevalent belief in today s American communities But is it Are there studies out there that show that if you ask a typical American, What do you think of girls most respondents say, They re mean She uses anecdotal evidence to prove that we used to think of girls as sweet and nice but now we tend to think of girls as cruel and catty She doesn t go into WHY people may think that beyond having been informed by books and movies there s no discussion about systemic misogyny, no examination of patriarchy and power dynamics and whose portrayal of social norms are the most heeded nor does she look into WHY girls may seem mean for instance, from an incel s perspective, females are The Worst when, in reality, they re not Who is perpetuating the whole idea At any rate, this new emergence of Mean Girls is why so many women don t have or want female friends But if we just stop assuming girls are mean, then we can bypass that myth and become better friends with other women This is something she firmly believes GIRLS AREN T MEAN, they re just portrayed that way in our modern age.But, honestly, this isn t even a new thing, mean girls have always existed Mean girls DO exist and I think we need to see them and read about them to know how to deal with them when we run into them so I disagree that deleting them from our lexicon, from our media streams, from our awareness is a productive way to make friends.She also gently derides male female friendships She doesn t go on to explain why, specifically, men and women can t be friends beyond the brief You find other women threatening, but, if she did break it down, it would probably sound something like this At any rate, she had a group of male friends but she came to realize she existed as a support prop for them and they didn t offer her much beyond the feeling of being special for being their token girl friend Therefore, women cannot have deep, meaningful friendships with men, not like they can with fellow women Is she willfully na ve Or just being coy On Pages 72 73, she talks about joining a sorority because her high school s Queen Bee, a term she asked us to stop using in the Mean Girls chapter and then uses here, was rushing She also joined to build her professional network She did NOT rush, she insists, to meet guys In fact, she didn t even understand that the guy she was dating wanted to make sure that the sororities she was considering mixed with the fraternity to which he was pledging because he needed know whether or not they d still be able to date She just didn t understand that fraternities and sororities pair up even though she s clearly watched all the movies and shows about this Later, she expresses how foolish she was to think the sorority girls who were soooo excited to see her were truly excited to see her during rush Again, despite being socially trained by Hollywood, if not by the women in her family circles, she didn t understand how this all works.She goes on to say she quit the sorority after two years because she met a guy and didn t need to look for a boyfriend any she wasn t in it to meet guys, though and he didn t like the Greek system anyway She hadn t made any friends in the sorority so she still hasn t made any female friends since childhood, when she states, in regard to this new romantic relationship of hers, we didn t completely isolate ourselves, like some starry eyed new couples do I m sure we did this to some degree, but I had friends who weren t in my sorority whom I thought were awesome and was conscious of not shutting them out.sooo wait, she did have friends That she met in college I did a lot of eyerolling at her un self aware stories.This is not just a compilation of her experiences, though She shares the insights of many, many women who value female friendship The bulk of these women are white and under 35, many in their 20 s It also sounds like they re successful, well educated, and probably upper middle class I m going to go out on a limb and also assume most of them are not limited by any disabilities and aren t queer and are probably not marginalized in any other way than that which comes from being perceived as a woman Her cultural references reflect the same thing She talks about mainly white women who have been portrayed as friends in media Laverne and Shirley Lucy and Ethel All the other white girls on Friends and any other white girls you can think of who have played friends on TV She does give a shout out to Oprah and Gayle and I think I remember her saying something about The Joy Luck Club but that s pretty much all you get for women of color Don t go looking for Phoebe Robinson and Jessica Williams You re not going to find Serena Williams discussing her friends Oh, wait, she does also mention Sandra Oh s character in Grey s Anatomy, somaybe I m wrong in thinking there s a preponderance of young white ladies referenced in this tome.One chapter is about female friendgroups squads In explaining how former Teen Vogue EIC, Elaine Welterorth worried the 2015 Taylor Swift squad could potentially alienate young women because it was too perfect, too manufactured, the author responds with I understand this, but I also think these pictures were an important start in seeing groups of women in a different way The users of squadgoals in 2015 were starting an image shift They were capturing and highlighting friendships they were proud of as they were going through life together Anything on Instagram is a little bit perfected, but the emotion behind the photos didn t feel airbrushed.I would argue the opposite The whole thing smacked of PR and marketing Friendship doesn t always look like squadgoals, though it certainly can squadgoals, however, always looked like women who were in freshman dorm or summer camp together finding out they liked each other and showing their enthusiasm for their unit to the world It lacked a sense of permanence, focusing solely on youth and exuberance and exciting moments.Also, don t argue with the Teen Vogue EIC because you ll just be wrong.And, come on Those Instagram shots were not creating an image shift They re no different from all the advertising campaigns that show women having fun together I mean, look at these squadgoals Forget your Red Hat Society with your purple wearing ways, this is how I want to be in, like, five years These women in bras and matching undies have diversity than this entire book Women who bleed together wear a lot of blue together Apparently They work hard and they play harder Because they have good insurance Even generic stock images show how much fun it is to be friends with other women.So, no Healthy female friendship has not been kept from our eyes I have no doubt you could find plenty images like these to bolster this statement.Not mentioned were other female friendships that young white girls could have been exposed to, such as Nancy Drew and her friends, George and Bess, or Trixie Belden and her friend Honey Or those that young women may have been exposed to in their Women s Studies classes in college For this author, though, there s a dearth of female friendship being portrayed before the 1980 s.But Source PinterestDescription Two young Italian women dressed in colorful gowns for the carnival by Elisabeth Anna Maria Jerichau Baumann on artnet Source PinterestDescription On the Dunes Lady Shannon and Kitty Sir James Jebusa Shannon Anglo American artist and one of the leading portrait painters in London Oil on canvas Smithsonian American Art Museum Bitch, please, if this isn t Ride or Die, I don t know what is.Source smarthistoryDescription Artemisia Gentileschi, Judith Slaying Holofernes, 1620 21, oil on canvas, 162.5 x 199 cm Uffizi Gallery, Florence.She ties everything up, after going on for many chapters about how positive representations of friendship between women have never existed historically, with Hundreds of years ago, there was a period when women s friends were supposed to be as valued as the other people in their worlds In England in the nineteenth century, women were expected to keep their friends close, both before and after they married who, by the way, also has a best friend and that friendship, melodrama aside, is far complex than most everything portrayed in this book You ll note there are two stars up there, rather than the 1 I m making it sound like this deserves That s because I did honestly enjoy the chapter Our BFFs, People, Soulmates Perhaps it was because this chapter focused mainly on other women s stories or maybe because it was the only chapter I could relate to whatever the case, I appreciated this one a lot I even sent a text shot to my own BFF we call each other soulmates It sparked a good, and maybe a bit weepy, conversation which I think is what this book was meant to do I wish the whole thing could have evoked such a response in me.So to sum up This is a book written by a woman who is dazzled by her glorious friendships with fellow women especially in light of not being brought up with strong examples of positive female friendship, though she will enumerate some of the non existent examples that had been available at the time She makes broad, blanket statements about how we, the people, view female friendships toxic, unnecessary, temporary then repeats a message of how much she loves her friends because of what they give to her Plus feminism The end.Shoutout to my GRBFF, karen We re already light years ahead in this game and we haven t even met.If you re looking for a lovely memoir outlining the joys of one woman s personal friendships and the connections she has made with friendship images in the media and if you enjoy contradictions, this is your book.Otherwise, I cannot recommend it flag 11 likesLike see review View 1 comment Feb 13, 2018 Jaclyn Crupi rated it liked it review of another edition Perfect Galentine s Day reading This book makes you want to grab your gal gang and hug them hard Female friendship is a force and I don t know where I d be without the ladies in my life I love how this book celebrates everything that female friendship is and the love we have for one another As Keira Knightley put it, Female friendships are fucking extraordinary flag 12 likesLike see review Apr 12, 2018 Barbara The Bibliophage rated it really liked it review of another edition Shelves feminism and women s studies, non fiction, own digital, audio, 2018, booked2018 Kayleen Schaefer explores twenty first century female friendships with gusto in Text Me When You Get Home Like a great coffee date with your bestie, it s the perfect blend of research, analysis, and real life stories By the end I was eyeing up that woman in the next lane and thinking, I wonder what we have in common besides swimming Text Me When You Get Home is a tribute and celebration of being a woman today, from work friendships to the fifth grade BFF that we still call every day.Schaefer Kayleen Schaefer explores twenty first century female friendships with gusto in Text Me When You Get Home Like a great coffee date with your bestie, it s the perfect blend of research, analysis, and real life stories By the end I was eyeing up that woman in the next lane and thinking, I wonder what we have in common besides swimming Text Me When You Get Home is a tribute and celebration of being a woman today, from work friendships to the fifth grade BFF that we still call every day.Schaefer talks about why female friendships are different now than they were fifty years ago It used to be that when women married and had kids, they moved away from their female friends They would befriend the mothers of their kids friends, rather than continuing to see the singleton friend from their career days Now, with the blurring of lines between home, parenting, marriage, and career, women expect to prioritize female friends higher than before.In pop culture, the female friendship has evolved also Schaefer discusses TV shows and movies as illustrations of how women connect From Grey s Anatomy and Legally Blonde, to Lena Dunham s Girls, women are making sure friendship is rendered accurately in the media Schaefer discusses the past predominance of cat fights in shows like Dynasty, and the efforts actresses and writers make today to offer a positive portrayal.In an age where woman have many ways to connect, Schaefer points out how our digital ways affect friendships She tells a story of a woman wishing for a particular group of friends Instead of bemoaning the lack of the group, she started one herself using Meetup Schaefer tells of her own efforts to stay connected to a friend in Australia.More than anything, I found myself remembering two close friends I don t see any We broke up over ten years ago and haven t seen each other since We were in our thirties and forties at the time, so this wasn t teen angst Both experiences were as traumatic for me as breaking up with a boyfriend.Schaefer has insight on the progression from the movie Heathers to today s Mean Girls, and whether that s an accurate portrayal But I wish Schaefer would have acknowledged that adult women don t always stay friends, and the end of that friendship isn t always pretty She paints a summarily rosy perspective, which I think is only one side of the story.My conclusions This was a terrific, easy to read nonfiction book If you re a woman struggling to connect to nonfiction, give it a try Schaefer makes Text Me When You Get Home accessible, interesting, and eminently relatable Many times I found myself thinking, Yes I ve felt that way It made me regret the friendships I haven t nurtured, and appreciating the friends who forgive my distractions.If you ve got a good friend who likes to read, this is a great one to read together You ll find plenty of ideas to discuss, and probably end up with a deeper appreciation of your friendship along the way.Acknowledgements Thanks to NetGalley, Penguin Group Dutton, and the author for the opportunity to read the digital ARC in exchange for this honest review flag 11 likesLike see review View all 5 comments Mar 06, 2018 Vanessa splitreads rated it liked it review of another edition Shelves 2018, listened on audiobook, nonfiction A mix of memoir Schaefer s personal friendships as well as those of friends she knows , some discussions about recent friendships in pop culture Parks Rec, Insecure, Broad City, Big Little Lies , and some history biology on female friendships It was a charming book that related the importance of female friendships and made me think of my own friendships There is nothing mind blowing here though, but the audiobook was a nice listen flag 7 likesLike see review Mar 16, 2018 Olivia Henry rated it did not like it review of another edition This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers To view it, click here I really wanted to like this book It just did nothing for me The impacts that my female friends have on my life are huge For me, the type of relationships described in this book are vital Here is the problem I have so are ALL of my other relationship types Whether it be my female friends, my family, male friends, or the relationship I have with the individual I am sharing my life with I feel these are equally important and have all impacted my life largely helped shape me as a huma I really wanted to like this book It just did nothing for me The impacts that my female friends have on my life are huge For me, the type of relationships described in this book are vital Here is the problem I have so are ALL of my other relationship types Whether it be my female friends, my family, male friends, or the relationship I have with the individual I am sharing my life with I feel these are equally important and have all impacted my life largely helped shape me as a human Schaefer paints this picture that as long as you have your girlfriends by your side, you are capable of being satisfied in all areas of your life I could not disagree I think relationship variety is key I really wanted this book to outline the importance of female friendships, but in order to get her point across, she continues to bash every other relationship type throughout Stating that if you have a solid enough foundation within your female friendships, there is absolutely no need for a passionate lover, sexual relationship, etc Really Why can t we have both There are so many examples given throughout of best friends being beyond jealous and unsupportive when their girlfriend finds a significant other Its outrageous to me I also found her extremely contradictory There is an argument that Schaefer tries to make regarding how women are not as catty as people lead us to believe which I agree with , she says that the thought that a friendship would end due to 2 women crushing on the same male is outrageous something you see only in the movies I tended to agree, but in the NEXT chapter, she discusses how in college, she herself lost a good friend for going on a date with a male whom she knew her friend was interested in These examples continue throughout the whole story Not to mention, sometimes it is HARD to make friends She makes it seems it s as easy as hi I m a girl too, want to be best friends forever That is absolutely not the case, there has to be a common ground level of interest sometimes it takes years to find people like you, and that s OK Also, what was with the conclusion chapter It was completely pointless and her examples devalued pretty much everything she argued up until then Mostly examples of selfish women who have a hard time encouraging their best friends to move on and to big better things with their lives I feel strongly of my dislike for this book because I feel the topic has great potential I was excited to read about it I imagine there is a lot of research to be done regarding the importance of female friendships, and can probably be done without bashing every other relationship flag 6 likesLike see review Apr 15, 2018 Miri rated it it was ok review of another edition Shelves sociology culture, gender studies I was really excited to read this because it s such an important topic, but I quickly found myself disappointed This book reads like a series of very long blog posts by a college freshman And if it were, I might ve liked it The writing just isn t very good and seems unedited It s repetitive and full of tedious plot summaries of various movies and TV shows, along with overly specific details about what the author and her friends or other women she interviews do together There s even I was really excited to read this because it s such an important topic, but I quickly found myself disappointed This book reads like a series of very long blog posts by a college freshman And if it were, I might ve liked it The writing just isn t very good and seems unedited It s repetitive and full of tedious plot summaries of various movies and TV shows, along with overly specific details about what the author and her friends or other women she interviews do together There s even a moment when she interviews her former boss to get his take on what a Chill Girl she was when she worked there, and when she says apparently in earnest that she knew she was destined to be friends with another woman when she saw that they had the same credit card Yikes The author tries to touch on things like race and interviews quite a few women of color about their particular experiences with finding friends and seeing or not seeing the importance of friendships among women of color recognized in the media However, ultimately, I think the book suffers from the limits of the author s white middle class Southern upbringing There are cringeworthy moments like her statement that the 1960s is when women started working outside the home, and the fact that she relegates 19th century romantic friendships and Boston marriages to just a few paragraphs in the conclusion that fail to mention that many of these probably WERE actually sexual and romantic relationships The unique friendship dynamics of queer women aren t discussed in the book at all, except that one of the interviewees happens to be a lesbian Plus the author and many of the people quoted repeatedly do that infuriating straight woman thing where they call friends girlfriends Can t we just have that term Please Further, the author frequently uses sex to mean gender, and gender essentialism and biological determinism are woven throughout the book The author and many of her interviewees repeatedly state that men just can t understand women the way that other women do as one of the reasons why friendships between women are so important This is simply false How this narrative impacts trans women and their friendships is also not discussed Overall, not what I hoped for at all and way too memoir ish for my taste, but I m glad it was written and published because hopefully that ll pave the way for better treatments of this subject flag 6 likesLike see review Mar 11, 2018 Simone rated it it was ok review of another edition Shelves 2018 read I had really high hopes for this book and I was so looking forward to reading it I think it was a case of the subtitle overselling whatever the book was attempting to do Instead, the book reminded me a lot of Life Moves Pretty Fast The Lessons We Learned from Eighties Movies and not in a good way For one, she seemingly implies that female friendships didn t exist before the 1980s, or maybe the 1950s Or at least she starts the book talking about how women in her mother s generation didn t h I had really high hopes for this book and I was so looking forward to reading it I think it was a case of the subtitle overselling whatever the book was attempting to do Instead, the book reminded me a lot of Life Moves Pretty Fast The Lessons We Learned from Eighties Movies and not in a good way For one, she seemingly implies that female friendships didn t exist before the 1980s, or maybe the 1950s Or at least she starts the book talking about how women in her mother s generation didn t have female friends She interviews two other people about this, Judy Blume, one other person, and reads the transatlantic letters Julia Child and one of her friends sent back and forth to each other This is apparently enough for her to include that female friendship didn t exist during this time period, which seems like quite a claim Perhaps it s because I went to an all women s college, or because my mother is passionate about the history of Greek letter organizations, and I belong to one of those organizations myself, but I think that the strong, close, female friendships Schafer is interested in existed before 1950, even if they weren t communicating via text message Perhaps the modern in the subtitle gives her a reason to pretend they didn t exist and lets her off the hook from investigating them Don t get me started on the chapter about joining a sorority, not trying to make friends, assuming everyone else is just there to meet boys, then drop out said sorority once she meets a boyfriend For another, she basically strings random anecdotes from her life, coupled with a discussion of television shows that prove her point These seem to exist to give her a reason to talk to television show creators and writers She just doesn t seem interested in talking to people who aren t already famous, have already written on the topic so they are easy to find , or she isn t close friends with or related to I mean, that s fine, but then you need to call this a memoir with some interviews And I think cut the long oral history on Beaches flag 6 likesLike see review Oct 22, 2018 Marjorie Elwood rated it it was ok review of another edition Shelves relationships This started out promisingly, celebrating the benefits of friendships between women and the love and affection that women can have for each other Our friendships the ones we re living every day can stand on their own They are supportive, enthralling, entirely wonderful, and, often, all we need Schaefer relates her personal history of female friendships and also discusses using mostly pop culture examples the history of friendships between women.Where things got a little problematic This started out promisingly, celebrating the benefits of friendships between women and the love and affection that women can have for each other Our friendships the ones we re living every day can stand on their own They are supportive, enthralling, entirely wonderful, and, often, all we need Schaefer relates her personal history of female friendships and also discusses using mostly pop culture examples the history of friendships between women.Where things got a little problematic for me was the author s assumption that the pop culture portrayal of women as mean and competitive is true, as opposed to a construct created to sell TV shows and movies There s a sense, among women at least, that achievement is a zero sum game, and that we re supposed to be cutthroat at all times If this is true, then it s a world I don t live in, fortunately As a result, much of the book felt like a defense rather than a celebration of female friendships Then there were the chapters that talked about the focus placed on men and male activities, where women are written about only as it pertains to their relationship with men, or how we spend our time watching boys men do things instead of doing things ourselves While making a good point, spending as much time on it as she did felt as though we were focusing on males yet again, even in a book about female friendship.It is in the description of her personal relationships that Schaefer shines she captures the energy of an all girlfriend gathering and the love and support that we receive from our friendships with other women flag 6 likesLike see review Jun 27, 2018 Kathy Denker rated it liked it review of another edition I m not sure if my moments of enjoying the book were the text itself, or the opportunity to reflect on my friendships The premise is solid, but I m not sure it needed the length that it took flag 6 likesLike see review View 1 comment Jan 01, 2018 Leigh Kramer rated it really liked it review of another edition An examination of the importance of female friendship, Text Me When You Get Home is sure to inspire a reflection about the role of female friendship in your life Part memoir and part social history, Schaefer s stories and illustrations show the many ways female friendship has evolved over the years Text me when you get home is a statement women use for many reasons It s to make sure our friend is safe or because we want an update on the cute guy they met at the bar or because we simply don t An examination of the importance of female friendship, Text Me When You Get Home is sure to inspire a reflection about the role of female friendship in your life Part memoir and part social history, Schaefer s stories and illustrations show the many ways female friendship has evolved over the years Text me when you get home is a statement women use for many reasons It s to make sure our friend is safe or because we want an update on the cute guy they met at the bar or because we simply don t want the conversation to end The phrase grounds this work and offers a place for Schaefer to start her exploration.The author and I have had drastically different experiences with friendship The arc of Schaefer s story of how she came to appreciate female friendship is well worth reading In the second chapter, she examines the prevalence of the myth of mean girls, a myth she bought into I never thought girls were mean I thought there were kids who are mean While I wouldn t want to repeat junior high or high school, reading about Schaefer s experiences made me even grateful for the friends I had back then I lucked out.In fact, I ve lucked out regarding female friendship throughout my life While my local community hasn t always been as big as I ve wanted, I have always, always had at least a few close friends As I ve grown older, I ve stayed connected to a large number of friends, not only across the US but around the world So often I d finish reading a chapter and be awash with gratitude for the women in my life Don t be surprised if you feel a deep need to call or text your friends to tell them how wonderful they are.The release of Text Me When You Get Home could not be timely As I read my advance copy, the MeToo movement had started to emerge and it made for quite the backdrop to my reading experience The book illustrated the many ways women look out for one another and support each other.The book offers mostly the perspective of white straight women and this is a missed opportunity I did appreciate Schaefer s examination of class and how this affects the way we approach friendship The history of friendship over the ages could have been in depth but if you re not aware of the history, as say presented in Bachelor Girl or All The Single Ladies, it s a good place to start.One of my favorite parts of the book was the way pop culture factored in For instance, we learn the history of Galentine s Day, which was created on Parks Rec and has become an actual holiday women celebrate in the years since That was such a good show Just thinking about Leslie and Ann s friendship makes me happy.I hadn t thought about the way friendship was presented on shows like Golden Girls or Designing Women this made me appreciate even how groundbreaking they were or how they paved the way for shows like Girlfriends and Sex and the City I m really glad I read this My female friends mean so much to me and I hope there will continue to be discussion about and appreciation of the importance of friendship Disclosure I received an advance review copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review flag 6 likesLike see review May 22, 2018 Madalyn Novel Ink rated it liked it review of another edition Shelves 2018, library 2.5 stars The premise of this book is excellent, but the execution felt one note It was all pretty surface level stuff Plus, even though it was published this year, it felt a little dated Like, some of the references weren t super relevant, and I think the way the author views female friendship is vastly different in some ways than the way my friends and I and other younger Millenials TM view it For me, the book could have benefited from structure, because the ideas felt disorg 2.5 stars The premise of this book is excellent, but the execution felt one note It was all pretty surface level stuff Plus, even though it was published this year, it felt a little dated Like, some of the references weren t super relevant, and I think the way the author views female friendship is vastly different in some ways than the way my friends and I and other younger Millenials TM view it For me, the book could have benefited from structure, because the ideas felt disorganized, and the disjointed structure made it hard to discern what, exactly, the author s point was Overall, this was disappointing flag 5 likesLike see review Jul 13, 2018 Ylenia rated it it was ok review of another edition Shelves 2018 reads, to unhaul, at my old house This book was a 288 pages long version of a BuzzFeed article on friendship Actually, BuzzFeed was often mentioned in the book itself.This book was a white, middle class account on having friends during your twenties or thirties, if you are a woman This book was so white Taylor Swift was mentioned at some point, in a discussion on squadgoals The author somehow realized she was talking about white people too much and remembered to mention intersectional feminism before the end of the book But This book was a 288 pages long version of a BuzzFeed article on friendship Actually, BuzzFeed was often mentioned in the book itself.This book was a white, middle class account on having friends during your twenties or thirties, if you are a woman This book was so white Taylor Swift was mentioned at some point, in a discussion on squadgoals The author somehow realized she was talking about white people too much and remembered to mention intersectional feminism before the end of the book But what about trans people What about people that are not born as women but identify as such, and have women friends Oh I m sure all the women that lived together for years during the 1950s were JUST friends I m sure all the quotes you have found about women saying the loved each other in letters in the 1800s were just saying it as friends Yeah, sure.I wanted to read this book to understand WHY and HOW female friendships are important how they evolved during the time, how we can make a difference, etc I got none of that I just got endless examples and stories that sounded all the same thing over and over, with different names The amount of references to TV shows of movies was annoying, too.I m bitter because I was expecting something completely different I didn t get this book to read a never ending amount of examples of great friendship and how friends are your soulmates and you should help each other out during hard times That s basic shit flag 6 likesLike see review View 2 comments Jul 01, 2018 Erin rated it it was ok review of another edition This a blog series This is a woman who did exactly the kind of shallow research that a journalist would do What is this meant to be Is it a memoir No, not really, although we hear allllll about Schaefer s sorority days, her boyfriend, and her friends she watches Scandal with I m pretty sure that at least 65% of the sources quoted in here are her friends, too This is augmented by some stunningly ahistorical research that is mainly about pop culture Beaches, Gone Girl, Mean Girls, Sex and t This a blog series This is a woman who did exactly the kind of shallow research that a journalist would do What is this meant to be Is it a memoir No, not really, although we hear allllll about Schaefer s sorority days, her boyfriend, and her friends she watches Scandal with I m pretty sure that at least 65% of the sources quoted in here are her friends, too This is augmented by some stunningly ahistorical research that is mainly about pop culture Beaches, Gone Girl, Mean Girls, Sex and the City, etc and is overwhelmingly white, straight, and middle class The whole book fucking reeks of no homo and it comes off pretty disdainful There are some interesting bits, like even the comparison between the post war generation of stay at home moms and 2nd wave feminism, or what friendship might have meant in the Middle Ages The conclusion hints at a engaging read, since somehow between the Middle Ages and the Edwardian Victorian period women were suddenly expected to have close, abiding friendships with other women Or how 21st century women might be renegotiating things like domestic partnerships, child rearing, and retirement But no, instead we get recaps of 90s tv shows, shallow personal anecdotes, and endless wo man on the street quotes that add up to essentially nothing Someone take this premise and write a better fucking book so I can read it flag 3 likesLike see review View 2 comments Dec 09, 2018 Dana Blazsek rated it liked it review of another edition 3 Stars Text Me When You Get Home by Kayleen SchaeferApparently, many people hate this book I would not say I loved it, but I definitely did not hate it There were parts I felt went on and on But there were some parts that made me laugh or smile because they made me think of my own best friends Some criticized the book for using movies and tv as ways to talk about female friendship, but I thought it was interesting than boring statistics Numerous other NF books drown you in numbers to 3 Stars Text Me When You Get Home by Kayleen SchaeferApparently, many people hate this book I would not say I loved it, but I definitely did not hate it There were parts I felt went on and on But there were some parts that made me laugh or smile because they made me think of my own best friends Some criticized the book for using movies and tv as ways to talk about female friendship, but I thought it was interesting than boring statistics Numerous other NF books drown you in numbers to make their points I found making connections to the pop culture during my time made it much interesting I listened to this on audio and I thought it was better that way flag 3 likesLike see review Jan 29, 2019 Steph rated it it was amazing review of another edition Shelves 2019, friends, non fiction Our friends are not our second choices They are our dates for Friday nights and for ex boyfriends weddings They are the visitors to our hometowns and hospital rooms They are the first people we tell about any news, whether it s good, terrible, or mundane They are our plus ones at office parties They are the people we re raising children with They are our advocates, who no matter what make us feel like we won t fail They are the people who will struggle with us and who will stay with us. Our friends are not our second choices They are our dates for Friday nights and for ex boyfriends weddings They are the visitors to our hometowns and hospital rooms They are the first people we tell about any news, whether it s good, terrible, or mundane They are our plus ones at office parties They are the people we re raising children with They are our advocates, who no matter what make us feel like we won t fail They are the people who will struggle with us and who will stay with us They are who we text when we get home Heart eyes emoji flag 3 likesLike see review May 31, 2018 Chessa rated it it was amazing review of another edition Shelves non fiction, readharder18 4.5 stars but I m rounding up I loved this so much I teared up approximately 9,347 times, and for someone who hates feelings, this is a lot and I still loved it.Though the author does a good job of showcasing women of color in the pop culture friendships she highlights, I worry a little about calling this a book about modern female friendship it feels just a little bit too broad, especially since the author draws on her own experience so much I really liked that she did draw on her own exp 4.5 stars but I m rounding up I loved this so much I teared up approximately 9,347 times, and for someone who hates feelings, this is a lot and I still loved it.Though the author does a good job of showcasing women of color in the pop culture friendships she highlights, I worry a little about calling this a book about modern female friendship it feels just a little bit too broad, especially since the author draws on her own experience so much I really liked that she did draw on her own experience, but the fact that she is a white woman universalizing her experience feels a bitweird.Despite that caveat, I did so enjoy this book One of my favorite reads of the year so far flag 3 likesLike see review May 07, 2018 Amy rated it really liked it review of another edition Shelves friendship, feminist, interesting heroines, non fiction, 2018 authors white women, adult audiences, e book This was just a lovely, reassuring look at how important female friendships are I loved the anecdotes from women about how much they relied on their lady friends, and it generally made me feel really good about the friends that I have I don t know that I learned anything I didn t already know, but I m glad that this is a conversation that is becoming mainstream Ladies are great, y all flag 3 likesLike see review Aug 17, 2018 Caitlyn rated it it was amazing review of another edition Shelves feminism, favorites, nonfiction My coworker recommended this to me, and I absolutely adored it This was such a positive, uplifting book about female friendship and it celebrates the intimate ways that women support and love each other Very refreshing to read, especially when so much of the media portrays female interactions as backstabbing and catty Highly recommend flag 3 likesLike see review Jan 11, 2018 Kelsey rated it really liked it review of another edition Rarely in recent memory have I had such strong feelings about a book, both positive and negative While reading, I kept texting a friend of mine to tell her about the various anecdotes and stories laid out in this book, sometimes in frustration, and sometimes in joy If nothing else, this book is compelling.The author, Kayleen Schaefer, does an excellent job of weaving her own memories and stories of her friends in with an exploration of female friendship in the 20th century although shoehorned Rarely in recent memory have I had such strong feelings about a book, both positive and negative While reading, I kept texting a friend of mine to tell her about the various anecdotes and stories laid out in this book, sometimes in frustration, and sometimes in joy If nothing else, this book is compelling.The author, Kayleen Schaefer, does an excellent job of weaving her own memories and stories of her friends in with an exploration of female friendship in the 20th century although shoehorned in at the end is a discussion of 19th century Boston marriages, which I feel deserved attention and context Starting with her time in high school as a mean girl, Schaefer describes her journey from internalized misogyny to recognizing the importance and criticality of women in her adult life, which was a nicely explored storyline and did culminate in the close group of friends she now has She ties in interviews with women she has known throughout her life, including her high school Queen Bee, her mother, and her current best friend, as well as media examples, such as the movie Mean Girls and the book it was based on.We also examine her first job in the professional world, which was at Details magazine I found it interesting to see the perspective of a woman who worked at a men s magazine because she despised the frivolous content of women s magazine s, only to later realize her hypocrisy at writing articles about the same kinds of things she thought were frivolous when about women Slowly, Schaefer overcomes her internalized misogyny and begins forging friendships intentionally, recognizing how important they are to her The book does stumble here at times, taking much too long on some things and not enough on others, but there s a lot of good information tied in with Schaefer s anecdotes.However, I found the second half of the book, which focuses on other women s experiences and media examples of friendships, much compelling than the first Here, Schaefer starts doing what I had hoped this book would do from the beginning, which is posit a new way to situate friendship within our society Instead of earlier in the book, when she and her friends would go to bars specifically to meet men or would date the same man and fight about it, this section actually starts to push the boundaries of heteronormativity, and challenges the notion that romantic relationships take precedence over friendships The anecdotes from women whose best friends are their emergency contacts, the ones who got them through chemo, or their true soulmates over their romantic partners were absolutely the best part of this book The notion that your best friend should also be the person you marry is deconstructed, and that is to Schaefer s credit I think that notion is unhealthy and it s wonderful to see it challenged here.However, this book struggles in two areas diversity and heteronormativity When exploring why women psychologically need friends, Schaefer cites a study that suggests women are psychologically wired to nurture, which made me cringe Evolutionary psychology really shouldn t have had a place in this book I would much interested in a historical contextualization of women working together as a community, and how that idea has changed over time post industrial era In addition, there was very little challenging of heteronormativity here, including a shockingly small mention of the LGBTQ community, who have traditionally been at the front of the found family concept Where was a mention of The L Word, which revolves around a group of female friends just like Sex and the City Even when discussing a straight and lesbian best friend pairing, little exploration was done into the context, which was surprising.Most of the sources in this book are also about white women, which was glaringly obvious There are about 10 pages towards the end that incorporate a number of diverse media sources, but the bulk of this book deals with white women in fact, in the conclusion section when Shaefer is tying up all her loose ends, the only women quoted are white women This was a glaring oversight and a little unfortunate More historical context about non white female communities would have been a nice addition.Overall, this was a book I am very glad that I read There is a lot contained in it, but at times I think Schaefer could have gone a little further with her analysis It is a very timely and important book, however, and one I m so glad was published It made me realize how lucky I am to have all the women in my life that I do, both past and present, and recognize that the all in one family idea is perhaps no longer relevant for our time Instead, we all need a group of female friends who will text us when they get home.Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Random House for the digital ARC in exchange for an honest review flag 3 likesLike see review Feb 27, 2018 Carey Gibbons rated it it was amazing review of another edition Pretty excellent meditation on female friendships and how they should be just as important as marriages and children and cats I especially liked the early chapters that talked about being a young woman in high school and college and how a lot of us are taught that our female friends are just stand ins while we wait for marriage Oh holy hell, I was guilty of this This book doesn t aim to bash marriage or say that friendships should replace it if marriage is your jam , but it says that women a Pretty excellent meditation on female friendships and how they should be just as important as marriages and children and cats I especially liked the early chapters that talked about being a young woman in high school and college and how a lot of us are taught that our female friends are just stand ins while we wait for marriage Oh holy hell, I was guilty of this This book doesn t aim to bash marriage or say that friendships should replace it if marriage is your jam , but it says that women are awesome and we should celebrate each other If you re single and have special ladies YASSSS If you re paired up with a dude, you can have that dude and a lady bff, or a lady posse Acknowledge, love, and respect your ride or die bitches I wish I had had this book when I was younger I kind of want to buy it for all of my lady friends now flag 3 likesLike see review Jun 15, 2018 Brooke Nuzie rated it liked it review of another edition Some parts of this I loved, some parts of this I hated I either could see myself in what she was saying, or adamantly opposed A lot of parts made me feel bad about myself Regardless, it gave me a lot to think about, but still only gets 3 stars flag 3 likesLike see review Mar 07, 2018 Michelle rated it it was ok review of another edition I won this book in a raffle and read it quickly I like the premise of this book YES to female friendships but it was a huge missed opportunity to go much deeper in many parts I feel like than half of it is a recap of movies and TV shows many of which are very white and I have not seen so it was wholly unrelateable , with the other half personal anecdotes It is very repetitive, and could have been condensed to a longform think piece This book is good to introduce the concept of fem I won this book in a raffle and read it quickly I like the premise of this book YES to female friendships but it was a huge missed opportunity to go much deeper in many parts I feel like than half of it is a recap of movies and TV shows many of which are very white and I have not seen so it was wholly unrelateable , with the other half personal anecdotes It is very repetitive, and could have been condensed to a longform think piece This book is good to introduce the concept of female friendships to people who haven t thought about this in a deeper way before, and in that way, it is important as an introduction If you already know why your female friends are important to you, and if you re looking for a greater analysis of female friendship and solidarity, I would skip this book flag 3 likesLike see review previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 next new topicDiscuss This Book There are no discussion topics on this book yet Be the first to start one Share Recommend It Stats Recent Status Updates Readers Also Enjoyed 1 likes More quotes renderRatingGraph 703, 1118, 1077, 408, 137 if rating_details rating_detailssert top rating_graph Company About us Careers Terms Privacy Help Work with us Authors Advertise Authors ads blog API Connect 2019 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    Kayleen Schaefer
    Kayleen Schaefer is a journalist whose work has appeared in The New York Times, Vogue, The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, and many other publications.

    Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship By Kayleen Schaefer

    Commentaires:

    Betsy Kipnis
    Ugh This book was a complete waste of time The author is self indulgent and weaves her fantastic state of friendship affairs in and out of historic discusssion of the evolution of feminine friendship as represented on television I read to avoid television and reading this book is like watching all the television shows I ve avoided sans Sex In The City The author replays way too much of mentioned show episodes, and as a premise this hardly reads as a sociological analysis but as a bunc Ugh This b [...]

    Marta
    This book is just a buzzfeed article about 20 reasons Your Galentine s Day Gal is More than Your BFF She s Your LITERAL SOUL MATE no homo But instead of Galentine s Day GIFs the author writes things like Galentine s Day was introduced to the world by Leslie Knope, a fictional midlevel bureaucrat in an Indiana parks and recreation department on the NBC sitcom Parks and Recreation The real question this book shaped listicle poses is who, or WHAT, wrote it Was it written by a real human This [...]

    Danielle H
    I feel it s appropriate to say that I texted one of my friends while reading, I am legit holding back tears reading this book at work because a girl s best friend died and I can t process the idea of you being dead She is a person I text when I get home There are so many of her and I am so incredibly lucky to have all of these women in my life who support me and love me and get me and let me tell them in so many ways, Let s keep talking Would really recommend to anyone who has ever l I feel it s [...]

    Dina
    I couldn t figure out what about this book rubbed me the wrong way until after I finished it.The incredibly patronizing author really doesn t have a clue.There were parts that resonated and made sense, but the author kept going on and on about how she shunned female friendships her whole life, how she looked down on women who had squads, and how she was of a man s girl and related to men than to women Then one day, she meets a girl in her office that GASP likes beer and yoga I couldn t figure ou [...]

    Meredith B. (readingwithmere)
    DNFFirst, I hate not finishing books I have the personality that I like to see something all the way through to the end but I just couldn t spend my time on this one This was our June book club pick and I really wanted to like it but I just didn t.This book is all about the female friendship and how it s evolved over time Honestly, I think the biggest issue I had with this book is that it s simply not relate able to me in the least Do I have close female friends Yes Do I cherish their frie DNFFi [...]

    Jen
    I wanted to like this book but I just didn t It was too chatty, anecdotal, heavy on pop culture references and felt very specific to young, white privileged middle or upper middle class women s experiences I don t know, I m not sure what I wanted from this book but I didn t get it Like, obviously female friendship is extremely powerful and rewarding and my best friend is basically like my life partner but this book didn t really illuminate anything for me and I just didn t care for the st I want [...]

    Stacey Kimmel
    I wanted to like this book, but I was hoping for something well researched and thoughtful Instead I found it repetitive and sophomoric I returned after the second chapter, which focused on, of all things, the movie Beaches I would not have thought this movie worthy of than a paragraph, but she spends a CHAPTER on it, recounting the plot, how it differs from the book, and actor actress reminiscences of its making She claims that there are no movies about female friendship, and no literat I wanted [...]

    • [AZW] ✓ Free Download ✓ Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship : by Kayleen Schaefer ↠
      171 Kayleen Schaefer
    • thumbnail Title: [AZW] ✓ Free Download ✓ Text Me When You Get Home: The Evolution and Triumph of Modern Female Friendship : by Kayleen Schaefer ↠
      Posted by:Kayleen Schaefer
      Published :2020-01-22T11:11:38+00:00